Month: February 2009

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Do you have cable or satellite TV?

My darn cable bill kept going up and up it seemed every couple of months. I had cable for quite some time and decided to check out  DirecTV.  Oh sure I had heard all of the bull that goes with satellite TV but that’s what it was, bull.  I talked with a friend of mine that has had DirecTV for quite some time and they have been totally happy with them.

Well that made me decide to check into some of the DirecTV offers I was hearing about and was pleasantly surprised at just how much I could save with them.  I could get several movie channels free for 3 months and when they say free, they mean free, not like some other deals that end up charging you for the free part anyway.

One thing is for sure, the DirecTV specials made it hard not to switch form cable so they’re coming tomorrow and installing my new satellite tomorrow with all the bells and whistles just like I had with the cable company but I’ll save a lot and get more with DirecTV over my cable.

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The Cowboy!!

I’m sorry but I got the funniest email I have read in a long time that I just had to share it with you guys.

A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife. She was a very good-looking woman and determined to keep the ranch, but knew very little about ranching, so she decided to place an ad in the newspaper for a ranch hand.

Two cowboys applied for the job. One was gay and the other a drunk. She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else applied she decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him around the house than the drunk.

He proved to be a hard worker who put in long hours every day and knew a lot about ranching. For weeks, the two of them worked, and the ranch was doing very well.  Then one day, the rancher’s widow said to the hired hand, ‘You have done a really good job, and the ranch looks great .. you should go into town and kick up your heels.’  The hired hand readily agreed and went into town one Saturday night.

One o’clock came, however, and he didn’t return. Two o’clock and no hired hand. Finally he returned around
two-thirty, and upon entering the room, he found the rancher’s widow sitting by the fireplace with a glass of wine, waiting for him. She quietly called him over to her.

‘Unbutton my blouse and take it off,’ she said. Trembling, he did as she directed.

‘Now take off my boots.’ He did as she asked, ever so slowly.

Now take off my stockings.’ He removed each gently and placed them neatly by her boots.

‘Now take off my skirt.’ He slowly unbuttoned it, constantly watching her eyes in the fire light.

‘Now take off my bra.’ Again, with trembling hands, he did as he was told and dropped it to the floor.

Then she looked at him and said, ‘If you ever wear my clothes into town again, you’re fired.’
(I didn’t see it coming, either!)

This reminded me so much of my friend Scott.  He loved it when he read it so I hope everyone understands.  Scott used to do the same thing with my clothes!  Love ya Scott!!!

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I bet you didn’t know this

I bet you had no idea that I happen to be a redhead.  Well I guess now that my secret is out I should let you in on something else too.  There is this web site now for redheads and people who love redheads.  Why?  Well I think it’s because redheads are quite different than blonds or brunettes.  See, redheads have the reputation of being rather hot headed.  I must admit I can be hot headed but who can’t given the right circumstances?  Not all redheads have freckles and green eyes either.  Each redhead is a unique individual and that’s part of what bonds us together.

I know that everyone is a unique individual but redheads are different.  I know this personally being one.  In fact, I have a couple of cousins that are also redheads and they are the ones that I’m the closest to.  Perhaps it’s because we sort of understand each other where others don’t.  I’m not sure but when I meet other redheads, they have a lot of the same feelings about things I do.  That’s what makes this web site such a wonderful thing for redheads.  Most of us have gone through our lives feeling different but on there, we’re all very much alike.  Pretty cool!!!!

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Homecoming ‘Queen’ at George Mason U

I absolutely love this article.  In fact, I just had to share it with you because I think it’s a wonderful article.

FAIRFAX, Va. – George Mason University students have elected a drag queen as homecoming queen. Student Ryan Allen beat out two women for the title at the 30,000-student school in suburban Washington, D.C., famous for its run to the Final Four a few years back. Allen competed under his drag queen persona of Reann Ballslee.

Allen, who is gay and performs in drag at nightclubs, said he entered as a joke. But he considers the victory one of his happiest moments and proof the school celebrates its diverse student body.

The senior from Virginia’s Goochland County won the pageant about a week ago at a sold-out homecoming basketball game against Northeastern. George Mason’s basketball team pulled off a string of upsets to advance to the Final Four in 2006.

Isn’t that wonderful!!  Well I think so anyway!

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Pickings are slim now

You know, American women have fought hard to be able to have careers, families, and as they say ‘Have it all’.  Well honestly, the pickings are getting very slim when it comes to finding a suitable man to marry.  I think one reason is because a lot of men not only in the United States but also in the United Kingdom, Canada and Australia aren’t interested in a ‘career woman’ for a wife.  What they seem to want is quite different.

Russian brides are now what they seem to be looking for from Russia.  Of course there are beautiful women in Russia just like there are beautiful women all over the world but it seems that Russian women have not been allowed to have careers and so all they know is to stay at home and be a good wife to a man.  There seems to be a lot of men that still want that.  Well there are a lot of American women that want that too but with the economy as it is, a lot of women have no choice but to work.  I really can’t say as I blame men for looking outside of their own country for a bride.  A lot of the women in their own country must not want them either.

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Leroy – Another funny for you!

A woman walks into the downtown welfare office, trailed by 15 kids. ‘WOW!’ the social worker exclaims. ‘Are they all yours?” ‘Yep, they are all mine,’ the flustered momma sighs, having heard that question a thousand times before. She says, ‘Sit down Leroy.’ All the children rush to find seats.

‘Well,’ says the social worker, ‘then you must be here to sign up. I’ll need all your childrens names.’

‘Well, to keep it simple, the boys are all named ‘Leroy’ and the girls are all named ‘Leighroy’.’

In disbelief, the case worker asked, “Are you serious? They’re ALL named Leroy?”

Their momma replied, “Well, yes — it makes it easier. When it’s time to get them out of bed and ready for school, I yell, Leroy!’ And when it’s time for dinner, I just yell ‘Leroy!’ an’ they all comes a runnin’. An’ if I need to stop the kid who’s running into the street, I just yell Leroy’ and all of them stop. It’s the smartest idea I ever had, namin’ them all Leroy.”

The social worker thinks this over for a bit, then wrinkles her forehead and says tentatively, “But what if you just want ONE kid to come, and not the whole bunch?”

“Then I call them by their last names..”

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Like to talk politics?

If you’re one that likes to talk politics then I have the perfect web site for you.  Check out political forums where you can voice your opinion or your concerns about politics.  Basically you can argue or agree with anyone you please in this forum and might even learn to look at things differently.

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Time for a cute joke

Only a person in Texas could think of this. It says it’s a true story but I don’t know. I just thought it was too cute not to share.

DWI – TEXAS STYLE!

From the county where drunk driving is considered a sport, comes this true story. Recently a routine police patrol parked outside a bar in Austin , Texas . After last call, the officer noticed a man leaving the bar so apparently intoxicated that he could barely walk.

The man stumbled around the parking lot for a few minutes, with the officer quietly observing. After what seemed an eternity in which he tried his keys on five different vehicles, the man managed to find his car and fall into it. He sat there for a few minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar and drove off.

Finally he started the car, switched the wipers on and off–it was a fine, dry summer night–, flicked the blinkers on and off a couple of times, honked the horn and t hen switched on the lights. He moved the vehicle forward a few inches, reversed a little and then remained still for a few more minutes as some more of the other patrons’ vehicles left.

At last, when his was the only car left in the parking lot, he pulled out and drove slowly down the road. The police officer, having waited patiently all this time, now started up his patrol car, put on the flashing lights, promptly pulled the man over and administered a breathalyzer test.

To his amazement, the breathalyzer indicated no evidence that the man had consumed any alcohol at all! Dumbfounded, the officer said, `I’ll have to ask you to accompany me to the police station. This breathalyzer equipment must be broken.’
‘I doubt it,’ said the truly proud Redneck. ‘Tonight I’m the designated decoy.’

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Talk about lucky!

A friend of mine married a guy in the service.  Well she just called me all excited about moving to Hawaii. Talk about lucky. I wish I could even visit there and she’s lucky enough to move there.  Not to mention she’s got a great guy too.

They are using this company that brings out this ‘ReloCube’ out to their house for them to pack all of their stuff into, and then they ship it where they’re moving too.  That is great.  In fact they are in good standings with the Better Business Bureau too so they know their stuff will be okay with them.

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Good one by the Air Force this time!

Luke AFB is west of Phoenix and is rapidly being surrounded by civilization that complains about the noise from the base and its planes, forgetting that it was there long before they were. A certain lieutenant colonel at Luke AFB deserves a big pat on the back. Apparently, an individual who lives somewhere near Luke AFB wrote the local paper complaining about a group of F-16s that disturbed his/her day at the mall. When that individual read the response from a Luke AFB officer, it must Have stung quite a bit.

The complaint:
‘Question of the day for Luke Air Force Base: Whom do we thank for the morning air show? Last Wednesday, at precisely 9:11 A.M, a tight formation of four F-16 jets made a low pass over Arrowhead Mall, continuing west over Bell Road at approximately 500 feet. Imagine our good fortune! Does the
Tom Cruise-wannabes feel we need this wake-up call, or were they trying to impress the cashiers at Mervyn’s early bird special?

Any response would be appreciated.

The response:
Regarding ‘A wake-up call from Luke’s jets’ On June 15, at precisely 9:12 a..m., a perfectly timed four- ship fly by of F-16s from the 63rd Fighter Squadron at Luke Air Force Base flew over the grave of Capt. Jeremy Fresques. Capt Fresques was an Air Force officer who was previously stationed at Luke Air Force Base and was killed in Iraq on May 30, Memorial Day. At 9 a. m. on June 15, his family and friends gathered at Sunland Memorial Park in Sun City to mourn the loss of a husband, son and friend. Based on the letter writer’s recount of the fly by, and because of the jet noise, I’m sure you didn’t hear the 21-gun salute, the playing of taps, or my words to the widow and parents of Capt. Fresques as I gave them their son’s flag on behalf of the President of the United States and all those veterans and servicemen and women who understand the sacrifices they have endured..

A four-ship fly by is a display of respect the Air Force gives to those who give their lives in defense of freedom. We are professional aviators and take our jobs seriously, and on June 15 what the letter writer witnessed was four officers lining up to pay their ultimate respects. The letter writer asks, ‘Whom do we thank for the morning air show? The 56th Fighter Wing will make the call for you, and forward your thanks to the widow and parents of Capt Fresques, and thank them for you, for it was in their honor that my pilots flew the most honorable formation of their lives.

Only 2 defining forces have ever offered to die for you….Jesus Christ and the American Soldier. One died for your soul, the other for your freedom.

Lt. Col. Grant L. Rosensteel, Jr..
USAF