I’m not a spring chicken anymore so security is very important to me. That’s why I called ADT and had them to install a new home security system for me. There have been some break-in in the neighborhood and a lot of people know I live alone. Well I know I can sleep securely now for sure.
Words to live by!!!!
A turkey was chatting with a bull. ‘I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree’ sighed the turkey, ‘but I haven’t got the energy.’ ‘Well, why don’t you nibble on some of my droppings?’ replied the bull. They’re packed with nutrients.’ The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree..
The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree. He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree.
Moral of the story:
Bull **** might get you to the top, but it won’t keep you there..
There must be something in the water!!
I told you about Rachel and Jayce getting engaged, well lightening has struck again with another of my waitresses. She came in last night showing off her new engagement ring. She said her fiance was looking at engagement rings before Rachel’s was but finally found the perfect one for her after Rachel got hers.
I had to explain that getting engaged was not a race and should not be treated as one. I must admit she has an absolutely beautiful ring but the most important thing is that you love one another. A beautiful engagement ring is just icing on the cake.
Perks of reaching my age
Yeah, you thought I was going to tell how old I was but that’s not going to happen. Someone had to remind me, so I’m reminding you too. Don’t laugh…..it is all true…Perks of reaching 50 or being over 60 and heading towards 70!
01. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.
02. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.
03. No one expects you to run–anywhere.
04. People call at 9 pm and ask, did I wake you?
05. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
06. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.
07. Things you buy now won’t wear out.
08. You can eat supper at 4 pm.
09. You can live without sex but not your glasses.
10. You get into heated arguments about pension plans.
11. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
12. You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who walks into the room.
13. You sing along with elevator music.
14. Your eyes won’t get much worse.
15 . Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.
16. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.
17. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can’t remember them either.
18. Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size..
19. You can’t remember who sent you this list.
And Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
The 5 stages of a womans life
THE 5 STAGES OF A FEMALE’S LIFE
1. To Grow Up
2. To Fill Out
3. To Slim Down
4. To Hold It In
AND
5. To Heck with it
Yup that’s me at number five, just to heck with it. How about you????
Rachel got a Tacori engagement ring!!
Well Rachel and Jayce have decided to get married before the baby is born. I was tickled pink to hear that because I honestly was afraid he would skip town on her. Well that’s not going to happen for sure because he bought her a Tacori engagement ring. Have you ever seen Tacori engagement rings before? They are absolutely gorgeous and about the best value for your money of any engagement rings I have seen. Yeah, I’m the one that told him about them. Not many people know that I was engaged years ago. They all think I am just a spinster I guess.
See my man bought me a Tacori engagement ring before he went off to war in Vietnam when I was 18 years old. I felt like the most special woman in the world. Just imagine this handsome Marine in his dress blues on his knee asking me to marry him while holding the most beautiful engagement ring I had ever seen. It didn’t take me but a second to say “YES”. He left for Vietnam two weeks later and never came home. I never thought about marrying anyone else either.
JR Dunn sure knows his diamonds and especially what will make a girl feel like a princess because that’s exactly what the diamond ring from his store did for me. That’s not all his store carries either so you should check him out if you want your lady to feel special too.
Have you seen this little angel?
Someone just sent me the cutest little angel. It says if you pass it on, you’ll receive money but who the heck believes all of that whoey? I guess it could happen but not because someone sent you this adorable little angel and you passed it on. I just wanted you to see the angel. She’s just too darn cute!!!
Is that not just the cutest thing you have ever seen?
Yeeeehaaaa!
Well one of my waitresses just told me the funniest joke and I wanted to share it with you. I didn’t realize what the end was going to be until she told me and I almost fell off of my bar stool laughing. I hope it at least brings a smile to your face too. Smiles are good for your soul you know!
A woman from New York was driving through a remote part of Arizona when her car broke down. An American Indian on horseback came along and offered her a ride to a nearby town.
She climbed up behind him on the horse and they rode off. The ride was uneventful, except that every few minutes the Indian would let out ‘Ye-e-e-e-h-a-a-a-a’ so loud that it echoed from the surrounding hills..
When they arrived in town, he let her off at the local service station, yelled one final ‘Ye-e-e-e-h-a-a-a-a!’ and rode off.
‘What did you do to get that Indian so excited?’ asked the service-station attendant. ‘Nothing,’ the woman answered. ‘I merely sat behind him on the horse, put my arms around his waist, and held onto the saddle horn so I wouldn’t fall off.’
‘Lady,’ the attendant said, ‘Indians don’t use saddles’
My niece just graduated with honors
I’m sure you can just imagine how very proud our whole family is of my niece graduating high school with honors. She’s not only a beautiful girl on the inside and outside but she has brains too. Beauty and brains, that’s a winning combination if you ask me. I wanted to give her something special for her graduation and Seiko Watches just happens to be one of my favorite things to give on special occasions like this. Not only are they useful, but they are of the finest you can buy. I wanted her to know just how proud I am and I think this watch will tell her just that.
She’s got a very bright future ahead of her and starts college this fall. Well a great time piece will help her to be on time for all of her classes and also show that she has class too. It took me awhile to pick out just the perfect Seiko Watch for her but when I found it, I knew this one was the one. She’s a very small and dainty girl but has also gotten over 5 deer too so she’s an all around kind of girl. What do you think of this watch I chose for her? I think it’s perfect.
How to hug a baby….by the family dog
If this isn’t the cutest thing you have ever seen, then you need to send whatever it is that is cuter than this.
Instructions for properly hugging a baby:
1. First, uh, find a baby
2. Second, be sure that the object you found was
indeed a baby by employing classic sniffing techniques.
3. Next you will need to flatten the baby before actually beginning the hugging process.
4. The ‘paw slide’
Simply slide paws around baby and prepare for possible close-up.
5. Finally, if a camera is present, you will need to execute
the difficult and patented ‘hug, smile, and lean’ so as to achieve the best photo quality.
